Talk:Raid on Onigashima

bits still feel off?
even though I know this page is constantly being updated, the grammar still feels off when reading. take "While he was briefly trapped under a pile of rubble, Orochi was beyond shocked when he discovered that the geisha "Komurasaki" he was enamored with for so long was in reality his enemy Oden's daughter, Kozuki Hiyori as she exclaimed all her animosity towards Orochi while she informed him that every day he sat on throne of Wano was a day too long and he was never truly the shogun." for example, it seems too jumbled, it's missing a "the" before "throne," and it (seems to be) missing a comma directly after "Hiyori." it's not hard to understand the sentence though, but when it continuously happens where i have to reread part of a sentence due to its jumbled-ness several times over, it discourages me from continuing to read. there are other examples too, but im not good at rewriting entire pages, it's a decent page but still a bit off to me.