User blog:DancePowderer/667 Abridged

I'm bored, that's why.

Luffy: What happened to our ride?

Chopper: He was a victim of irony, and of his boss being a heartless prick. The yetis attacked us on orders to kill. By the way, the kids and I are fine, thanks for asking. We can't send the kids back to the lab. Anything else obvious I should state?

Luffy: I get it, I'm going. Kill the huge guys, not Nami.

Franky: I'm going too. Ain't no way I'm getting defiled by some crazy sasquatches. Chopper, gimme some of your senzu beans.

Chopper: Here's one. But listen, these only work for three minutes and you'll be drained afterwards, so...

Franky: Blah blah blah powerful.

Chopper: You need Kung Fu Point if you...

Franky: Tastes like chicken. WRAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Chopper: WHY!?

Luffy: Franky, catch me if you can!

Franky: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Usopp: So Franky is going to be....

Chopper: Completely fucking useless.

Robin: You were expecting something useful?

In the lab.

Clown: I can't believe this guy has a laser like that. I am going to violate my lack of ethics by ripping him open and exploring his insides.

Subordinate: Kinky, sir. So, are the Marines going to have a part any time soon?

Clown: I'm talking to producers, so probably. Until then, let them hide from the plot.

Back to the plot.

Nami: Why do I always make such prime kidnapping material? What about my adorable face, smoking hot body, well-above average intellect, and large reserves of gold or cash make me so desirable?

Rock: Define hot.....

Scotch: I think he bats for the other team.........

Nami: Well, when my captain gets here, he's going to beat you up, and then you'll be sorry!

Rock: Shut the hell up.

Scotch: Cool. The weapons on your body must be cool. Wanna know what else is cool? The weather. Wanna know what else'll be cool? Our reward.

Rock: Scotch, stop trying to develop a catch phrase. We're not going to be that important. We're sub-bosses at best. It's not worth wasting....

Nami: I can see your chests, and they're ugly.

Rock: Don't look at us! And they're not ugly, they're perfectly normal.

Nami: If you're so proud of them, then why are you covering them?

Scotch: Because, it's cold.

Nami: Keep telling yourself that.

Rock: Shut up! We use bigger guns than you, and we can use poisonous stuff too. And we're really good at hiding too!

Nami: Hiding and using a big gun, obviously you're not compensating for any insecurities. I bet I know something else you guys never show.

Scotch: Well, at least we don't need our friends to save us. They'll be here soon, all according to our master plan.

Nami: Mhm.

Luffy: Holy expected dramatic irony! Footprints! They'll be easy to follow! C'mon angry Franky. Huh? Where'd the feet go? Oooooooh, oops.

Rock: Told you.

Scotch: Thank God he's an idiot.

Luffy: Hi, Nami! Where did that field of incredibly sharp icicles come from?

Rock: Even we aren't sure.

Luffy: All those icicles make me hard. In any case, smashy time!

Rock: Very good, but can you handle BULLETS!?

Luffy: Gomu Gomu no Fattie! The better question is, can you? Gomu Gomu no Grazie Padre Rebound!

Rock: Well...f#%k.

Scotch: Unlike my brother, I won't go down so easily!

Luffy and Nami: That's what she said!

Scotch (shooting): DIE!

Luffy: You missed.

Scotch: Did I?

Luffy: Franky, NO! Bad mutant reindeer! Bad!

Rock: I'm still alive. Being the apparent attention whore I am, I am insulted I am not the center of attention.

Franky: MOMENTARY CLARITY!

Rock: Momentary wha-OOOHHHH, I have visual awareness of the action you performed at that particular location.

Nami: How can you be useful!?

Luffy: Good job Franky, you're learning to be productive.

Franky: Moment's up!

Luffy: Gomu Gomu no Overkill!

Scotch: MY DOLLY!

Luffy: Sorry Franky! I get a kick out of wasting people biologically younger than me and then abandoning them. Heal yourself later. Bye!.

Scotch: I love leapfrog! Harder to do when you're alone. Hey, Law! Wanna play leapfrog?

Law: I'm more partial to pointless mutilation. But thanks.

Scotch: Really: Me too! Here's how I do it.

Law: You got chills, they're multiplying. It's electrifying! Today's special, smoked yeti.

Luffy: Thanks!

Nami: Make me sexy again!

Law: So, Luffy, how do you feel about longterm foreshadowing?

Luffy: Nami, look, I'm a chain chomp.

Law: In short, I wanna form an alliance, and together with my plan, we will fu#%k shit up like it's never been before. You in?