User blog:DancePowderer/Creepy vs. Sleepy: Dance of Sparks

Well, it's that time again. Hello, and welcome to another edition of One Piece: Battle Betting Corner (OP: BBC. No one's sued yet, so I think we're in the clear). I'm DancePowderer, and as usual, I have a guest panel with me, and here they are. Please, give it up for Zoro, Robin, returning guest Nami, and Neptune! Well, Zoro, you are about to fight Hordy Jones, a former soldier in the Neptune Army, a powerful pirate captain, and the scourge of Fishman Island! Let's kick this off by you giving me your take on the upcoming fight.

Zoro: Ugh, did it have to be under water? I like fighting on land better. I really hope the water doesn't slow me down.

DP: Valid worries, Zoro, valid worries. Nami, you know a thing or two about under water stuff, what is your take on the fight? Nami? Huh, wait, where'd she go? She was just here a moment ago.

Zoro: Oh yeah, she apparently ran off somewhere. Brook told Usopp who told me, no clue where she is.

DP: Ok, anyway...Robin, I'd love to hear your take, a view of the fight coming from someone not directly involved in what led up to it.

Robin: Well, I have no clue what's going on at the palace. Although, going by what Zoro said, I do agree he will have an advantage fighting underwater against a fishman, similar the the handicap Sanji faced when fighting against Arlong's subordinate Kuroobi.

DP: Hold on, how did you find out that Jones is a fishman and how Sanji fought Kuroobi because-

Robin: Poneglyph.

DP: Poneglyph?

Robin: Poneglyph.

DP: Ok.....Your majesty, what do you make of the fight? Perhaps you have some advice to give to Zoro, having known Jones in the past and having the battle be on your home turf?

Neptune: Zoro, there is one weakness of Jones's that I think you should know. Do you by any chance have a saw, a pound of raw spaghetti, a funnel, a rock, a Skypiean bible written in Poneglyph, a rubber duck, and about three feet of sea train rail? With those combined, there is a way to defeat Jones.

Zoro: OF COURSE NOT!

Neptune: Oh. Dang, you're screw- I mean, you must defeat him with your raw power then.

Zoro: You mean, like what I was planning to do FROM THE BEGINNING!?

Neptune: Yeah, like that, whatever. (mutters) At least the water won't leave any blood stains.

Zoro: What did you say?

Neptune: Poneglyph, I mean, try not to break too much else. Believe it or not, the palace isn't insured, and there is going to have ot be a maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaajor tax hike next year to cover repairs.

DP: Then it's a good thing that no one on Fishman Island has cable, I hope. So, onto everyone's favorite part of the show, the betting! Zoro, as the fighter, you get to place yours first.

Zoro: The only money I have is the 100,000 beli I borrowed from Nami two years ago. That, and about 89,000,000 that I made doing stuff with Mihawk. So, 100,000 on the angry looking guy with the scar.

DP: Which angry looking guy with the scar?

Zoro: ME, you idiot.

DP: Whatever, sleepy. Robin, place your bet.

Robin: Well, Jones does have the advantage, but I don't want to hurt swordsman-san's feelings, so I'll put 20,000,000 beli on Jones and 19,000,000 on Zoro.

Zoro: Wait, where did you get 39,000,000 beli!?

Robin: Nami.

Zoro: What's kind of insane interest do you-

Robin: None.

Zoro: You know, I'm glad she ran away now.

DP: And lastly, Neptune, what's your bet.

Neptune: I bet the cost of the repairs on Zoro, which, thanks the the Left Minister's accounting, is estimated to be roughly 390,000,000 beli.

DP: Robin, if you place your bets at 10:1 on either fighter, you could make enough money to-

Robin: Nope.

DP: But you could help repair the-

Robin: Nope, mine.

DP: (Sighs) Ok, well that's it for One Piece: Battle Betting Corner. Tune in next time, good night!