User blog:Fliu/A Song For Charlotte Linlin

Here’s something I’ve come up with for the month of December. It’s a parody song for none other than the Yonko, Charlotte Linlin, whom I believe is the ugliest woman of the One Piece world. It’s a parody of “You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”. And in this song, the Grinch is Linlin.

You're a mean one, Big Mom

You’re as wide as a blimp

You're more spoiled than a rotten apple

You're as charming as a witch, Big Mom!

You're a bad lemon

With a very sour stench!

You're a monster, Big Mom

Your heart's as dark as black

Your brain is full of needles

You've got salt in your soul, Big Mom!

I wouldn't touch you with

Perospero’s Candy Cane!

You're a vile one, Big Mom

You have acid in your smile

You have all the tender sweetness

of a rain soaked mushy bento, Big Mom!

Given the choice between the two of you

I'd take the rain soaked mushy bento!

You're a foul one, Big Mom

You're as nasty as a rat

Your heart is full of muddy treats

Your soul is full of slime, Big Mom!

The three words that best describe you

Are as follows, and I quote:

"Big"

"Fat"

"Ugly"!

You're a rotter, Big Mom

You're the queen of sinful greed

Your heart's a rancid strawberry filled

With worms and mold, Big Mom!

Your soul is an appalling garbage dump

Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment

Of deplorable rubbish imaginable

Mangled up in tangled up knots!

You nauseate me, Big Mom.

With a nauseas super-naus

You're a crooked jerky glutton

And you’re filled with bitter sweets, Big Mom!

You're a three-layer

Spongy and fluffy cake

With putrid raspberry sauce!